So, for our 3 year marriage anniversary, my husband witnessed me:

* crying when my new replacement stereo ate my phone's entire address book, neither saving a copy on the stereo nor leaving a copy on the phone

* vomiting FIVE times from heat exhaustion and sleeping for 12 hours

* crying for a second time in four days when my car decided to fail while driving

* being a surly, cranky, wretched child when things just sort of fell apart all weekend, again and again, as has been the way since moving away from him

Still, we held hands and meandered down San Antonio's Riverwalk late at night, explored a new zoo in a new city, saw the teeny tiny real Alamo all lit up at night, mocked the ridiculousness of generic suburban America. He even emptied the garbage can I vomited in.

I love that man with all of my heart. I just wish I wouldn't put him through such hell every time he comes to see me.

Texas really, really disagrees with me.

I may also be a little pre-menstrual.

Perfectly justified in the homicidal rage department, though, I think. Just more inclined to cry while beating crackheads. :)


Glad I have a climbing date scheduled for tomorrow. I need some bouldering zen.

Yeah. Got my car back. (Had to track it down, mind you!)

Left work to go get it, swapped out the rental for my shiny old car, mourned (briefly) the back-alley abortion that is what my stereo used to be, then went back to work.

Came out, many long hours later, to a flat tire. A freshly cleaned, yet pancake flat, tire.

Could only pop loose one of the lugnuts, so had to involve others in my attempts to get the fuck on with my life.

Tire removed and swapped out for a donut that was so terrifying to behold that I was urged to drive the slowest possible speed to the closest possible shop.

Donut blew out en route.

Made it unscathed, if white-knuckled, to Sears Auto, roughly two miles away.

They were able to fix it rather than replace it.

It appears that the stem had been cut or snapped. Normally, stems break when you rub curbs with them. This was the driver's side rear. No curb-rubbing. I swear.

So. Houston can suck my non-existant BALLS.

Truly.

So, when I first moved out here, I got locked out of my apartment due to lock failure.

A few weeks ago, someone stole my craptastic old bike off the porch by hacksawing their way through the chain. They also stole my neighbor's gf's much more expensive bike.

Last night, someone smashed my passenger side window and stole my cherished, very expensive mp3/cd/iPod-docking/hands-free-BT stereo.

I hate Houston crackheads. I really, really do.

The bike has been replaced and upgraded, and now lives in my dining room, and the car is at the shop. Stuff is stuff, I know. But goddammit. The fact that I live on the first floor isn't lost on me either.

I want to move back home to my hubby. I hate this alone and scared shit.

Hate, hate, hate.

If I were a stone, I would be....jasper (microcrystalline quartz)

If I were a tree, I would be a....baobab

If I were a bird, I would be a....secretary bird

If I were an insect, I would be a....bombardier beetle

If I were a fruit, I would be a...durian

If I were a flower, I would be a....rafflesia

If I were a kind of weather, I would be a....supercell

If I were a mythical creature, I would be a....basilisk

If I were a musical instrument, I would be a....cello

If I were a kind of profession, I would be a.... caregiver to orphaned orangutans (a la Orangutan Island)

If I were an animal, I would be a(n)....orangutan, of course!

If I were anything in the world, I would be... aurora borealis

If I were anything in the universe, I would be...stardust

If I were a color, I would be....copper

If I were an emotion, I would be....restlessness and delight, alternating

If I were a vegetable, I would be a....clove of garlic

If I were a sound, I would be ....ocean waves at night on an outgoing tide

If I were an element, I would be... the Fifth. No, fire! Er ... iron (Fe)?

And you?

So, using the last of my on-the-verge-of-expiring flexible spending account dollars, I had my eyeballs suctioned and lasered and other such atrocities a la Clockwork Orange, and now I can see 20/20 in both eyes with no help from contacts or glasses or anything other than a good blink. :)

I had the blade-free LASIK, and though I am not very far into the recovery process, so far I would highly recommend it, if only for the cool blood-bruise circle you get around your iris from the suction cup. I could so be a zombie extra right now!!! (I know, I will try to get pictures. This shit has to be documented properly!)

So, off to bed to rest my weary (ok, merely irritated and dry) eyes for a bit. Wicked (G. Maguire) on my iPod will have me out in moments.

Dude.

We live in the future. The steampunk-influenced future, but the future nonetheless.

I am now looking into polygamy options, so that I might marry Eddie Izzard and have his wee, tiny monkey-badger babies.

Of course, I would have to have tigers at the actual ceremony. And giraffes. Coughing. And performing charades. In Latin. With squirrel toaster elephants.

Go see STRIPPED, everybody. You must.

Gacked from trollprincess:

1. My username is ______ because ______.

littlegothkitty, because everything monkey-related was taken and my sweet boy cat was one of my userpic choices, so given that he is black and broody, the name 'little goth kitty' fit the bill.

2. My name is _____ because ______.

"Robot King of the Monkey Things" because I loved King Louie in Madagascar. Lemurs rock! Dancing lemurs even moreso!

3. My journal is titled ____ because ____.

"In the time of chimpanzees I was a monkey" because 1) Monkeys! and 2) "...I was Orangutan" doesn't really flow, now does it? And besides, you know those orangs were calling us silly white monkeys behind our backs. So true.

4. My friends page is called ____ because ____.

"in our travels abroad" is a line from an Ani DiFranco song, but it's also just ... appropriate. If I can't travel IRL, I can enjoy what's happenin' in y'all's worlds online.

5. My default userpic is ____ because ____.

Me with a capuchin monkey on my shoulder. Because I had a monkey on my shoulder. And the world should know this.

So ...

I entered a marathon.

To date, my total race experience equals one 5K back in January, and an upcoming 15K in May (through WDW, no less).

I have no idea what possessed me. I blame my friend Angela.

Anyways, the training itself is enjoyable. The slow (attempted) change in my diet from what has kept me functioning as a keeper (protein bars, protein bars, and more protein bars) to what allows me to go run 6 miles after work is far, far more challenging. I've opened up a can of worms with names like Self Loathing, Abandonment, Guilt and Fear. Notsomuch with the fun.

Anyways, in trying to have a modicum of success in this endeavor, I'm airing my emotional dirty laundry for all of LJ to see, because I've spent the last 30 years trying to bury it and it hasn't helped me one bit.

So, here goes. 29 weeks until 26.2 miles. w00t.

Today, we were treated to a mother-of-all thunderstorm. Windows rattling, power flickering, the works.

Today, we were also blessed with a baby coatimundi.

Thunderstorm + nest box not not high enough off the ground OR scared mama = dead baby.


Actually, it looks like it was probably stillborn.


There's been an unbelievable amount of birth complications and tragedies. Julie is convinced it's all Hurricane Ivan related, and she may not be wrong.

Poor Betty, mama coati, is still sitting outside, keening over her dead baby, grooming it and moving it about. She's the picture of misery.

Mother nature sucks sometimes. :(

Dear God, I've seen more than half of these movies.

( Time to get out. But not to the theatres, apparently. ;) )
My Contributions:
372. George of the Jungle
373. Barefoot in the Park
374. The Pest
375. Requiem for a Dream
376. Ricky Oh!

Graduation was Wednesday. w00t!

Weirdly sad and happy to be done with the program.  Things here in Pensacola are coming to a head, so change is on the agenda in a very big way. 

Got bored and changed some stuff about my LJ layout and profile. 

Finally properly updated my resume. 

Not a real entry, but oh well!  Got good grooming love today from my favorite hex monkey, Sophie.  I'm going to miss that guenon something fierce. 

Have I mentioned my injury log before? Rick required that I jot down everytime I get nailed by something (since starting the program), more for his amusement than anything else, and it makes for interesting reading.

To date:

Animal Related Injuries
Animal	Injury	Date Inflicted
Drago (lynx)	bite on left forearm	Oct-03
Sumo (serval)	scratch along upper lip	Dec-03
Rhino Iguana	bite on right middle knuckle and pinky finger	Apr-04
Betty (coati)	bite on left middle fingertip	Jul-04
Mocha (coati)	bite on left lower leg	Oct-04
Johnny Cat (caracal)	bite just below left kneecap	Nov-04
Green Iguana	scratches on left wrist	Dec-04
Apollo (siamang)	scratch on right cheek	Jan-05
Tux (blackfooted penguin)	bite/bruise on left calf	Feb-05
Johnny Cat (caracal)	bite on right elbow	Feb-05
Sable (otter)	bite on right index finger	Feb-05
Oreo (blackfooted penguin)	bite on left ring finger	Mar-05
juvenile 0.1 brown pelican	bite across right pinky and index fingers	Mar-05
Sable (otter)	bite on same right index finger, below knuckle	Apr-05
1.0 kangaroo	scratch on right forearm from back feet	Apr-05

Admittedly, most of these are from either medical treatments (catchups and the like) or animals that I work in with on a regular basis... Still!

What's your most interesting scar?  Anyone?

In the"oddities-'n'- certain-signs-o'-the-upcoming-apocolypse" category:



We were subject a 15 minute deluge of eyeball-sized hail this morning.

In Pensacola.

In late March.

WTF????

I accepted a ( DIVER ) position at the Gulfarium on Wednesday, at least through the summer.

Nervous. Excited. Scared. Flattered.

The timing of it just feels right, though, like 'Get through this - huge amount of fears to conquer with this job - and gain so much in such a short time.
Right. Now, off to research the Zoo Science program at UWF a little more thoroughly. ;)

The image is a little funky, as it's a capture of me still in the plane overlaid by me tumbling out of the plane in a cannonball.  Best we could do with video capture.  Rick's should be viewed at : http://www.monkeyhex.com/index.cfm/webid/2/cid/10

prostitots

1. little girls that wear tight low cut jeans and belly shirts like Britney Spears  "Check out those prostitots over there.  What ya think . . . are they 11?  12?"

http://www.thesource4ym.com/teenlingo/index.asp

Got  to wrassle a dolphin yesterday.  (He needed a shot of meds that he refused to take voluntarily, so 8 of us pinned him and forced the issue.)  It went well and was hella cool in a freaky sort of way.  The things I now do on a daily basis ...

Also got a 'high five' from  the same river otter that bit the hell out of my index finger knuckle last week.  Go me.  ;)

Been feelin' rather out of control lately, so trying to sort that out.  Still no long-term plans made re: upcoming graduation.

The mildewy smell has returned to the computer room due to 24 hours of steady rain, so this is a short entry. 


In other news: 

Only I can puncture my fingertip with the WRONG end of a needle.  :P

So knowbuddy and I have decided, science research dorks that we are, to document  weight gain/general progress on the new kinkajou. 

I'll be posting pix daily.  We used a soda can for size comparison of him stretched out, and my Rio (3"  X  2.4")  for size comparison of him balled up.

Right now, he is 8 days old.  This is his first day on the bottle (as he was pulled last night), and he has a slight cold due to the weather changes.  His eyes are still closed,  but he's already highly mobile. 

In other news, none of the 3 serval kittens born Friday made it past today, which sucks.  I hope we fare better with the caracals due at the end of February.  I miss kitty love.

Oh, almost forgot!  Get your own kitty love here (courtesy of the VERY talented hedgegoth).  My calendar arrived today and it's stunning! 

( On to the baby kink pix!! )